Bill Vaughan Quotes
"The Vice-Presidency is sort of like the last cookie on the plate. Everybody insists he won't take it, but somebody always does."
"The groundhog is like most other prophets; it delivers its prediction and then disappears."
"It's hard for the modern generation to understand Thoreau, who lived beside a pond but didn't own water skis or a snorkel."
"A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, but won't cross the street to vote in a national election."
"A three year old child is a being who gets almost as much fun out of a fifty-six dollar set of swings as it does out of finding a small green worm."
"A real patriot is the fellow who gets a parking ticket and rejoices that the system works."
"An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves."
"People learn something every day, and a lot of times it's that what they learned the day before was wrong."
"It would be nice if the poor were to get even half of the money that is spent in studying them."
"Man is the animal that intends to shoot himself out into interplanetary space, after having given up on the problem of an efficient way to get himself five miles to work and back each day."
"Maybe the answer to Selective Service is to start everyone off in the army and draft them for civilian life as needed."
"I'm an actor. And I guess I've done so many movies I've achieved some high visibility. But a star? I guess I still think of myself as kind of a worker ant."
"By the time you're eighty years old you've learned everything. You only have to remember it."
"If there is anything the nonconformist hates worse than a conformist, it's another nonconformist who doesn't conform to the prevailing standard of nonconformity."
"The tax collector must love poor people, he's creating so many of them."
"Now that women are jockeys, baseball umpires, atomic scientists, and business executives, maybe someday they can master parallel parking."
"In the game of life, it's a good idea to have a few early losses, which relieves you of the pressure of trying to maintain an undefeated season."
"To God, thy country, and thy friend be true."
"We hope that, when the insects take over the world, they will remember with gratitude how we took them along on all our picnics."
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