Douglas Adams Quotes

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"Many men of course became extremely rich, but this was perfectly natural and nothing to be ashamed of because no one was really poor, at least no one worth speaking of."

"That young girl is one of the least benightedly unintelligent organic life forms it has been my profound lack of pleasure not to be able to avoid meeting."

"Life... is like a grapefruit. It's orange and squishy, and has a few pips in it, and some folks have half a one for breakfast."

"I'm spending a year dead for tax reasons."

"Arthur hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realised there was a contradiction there and merely hoped that there wasn't an afterlife."

"I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by."

"Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job."

"Humans are not proud of their ancestors, and rarely invite them round to dinner."

"I think fish is nice, but then I think that rain is wet, so who am I to judge?"

"If it looks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands."

"If somebody thinks they're a hedgehog, presumably you just give 'em a mirror and a few pictures of hedgehogs and tell them to sort it out for themselves."

"It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes."

"One always overcompensates for disabilities. I'm thinking of having my entire body surgically removed."

"The difficulty with this conversation is that it's very different from most of the ones I've had of late. Which, as I explained, have mostly been with trees."

"The Guide is definitive. Reality is frequently inaccurate."

"The mere thought hadn't even begun to speculate about the merest possibility of crossing my mind."

"Time is bunk."

"We demand rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty!"

"We have normality. I repeat, we have normality. Anything you still can't cope with is therefore your own problem."

"He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it."