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Robert Orben Quotes

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"Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work."
Business

"Do your kids a favor - don't have any."

"There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all."

"Washington is a place where politicians don't know which way is up and taxes don't know which way is down."
Government

"Do you ever get the feeling that the only reason we have elections is to find out if the polls were right?"
Politics

"A graduation ceremony is an event where the commencement speaker tells thousands of students dressed in identical caps and gowns that 'individuality' is the key to success."

"Life was a lot simpler when what we honored was father and mother rather than all major credit cards."

"Don't think of it as failure. Think of it as time-released success."

"I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home."

"Never raise your hand to your children it leaves your midsection unprotected."

"Every morning I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work."

"To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so."
Computers

"Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch."

"Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get."

"Inflation is the crabgrass in your savings."

"More than ever before, Americans are suffering from back problems, back taxes, back rent, back auto payments."

"Every speaker has a mouth; An arrangement rather neat. Sometimes it's filled with wisdom. Sometimes it's filled with feet."

"Time flies. It's up to you to be the navigator."

"If you can laugh together, you can work together."

"Inflation is bringing us true democracy. For the first time in history, luxuries and necessities are selling at the same price."

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