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Will Rogers Quotes

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"I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts."
Politics

"Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock."
Politics

"An economist's guess is liable to be as good as anybody else's."
Business

"It's not what you pay a man, but what he costs you that counts."
Business

"If you can build a business up big enough, it's respectable."
Business

"The schools ain't what they used to be and never was."

"There is nothing so stupid as the educated man if you get him off the thing he was educated in."
Education

"America is becoming so educated that ignorance will be a novelty. I will belong to the select few."

"All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that's an alibi for my ignorance."

"We are all here for a spell, get all the good laughs you can."

"I read about eight newspapers in a day. When I'm in a town with only one newspaper, I read it eight times."

"There's no trick to being a humorist when you have the whole government working for you."

"If the other fellow sells cheaper than you, it is called dumping. 'Course, if you sell cheaper than him, that's mass production."

"In Hollywood you can see things at night that are fast enough to be in the Olympics in the day time."

"When should a college athlete turn pro? Not until he has earned all he can in college as an amateur."

"One Ad is worth more to a paper than forty Editorials."

"One-third of the people in the United States promote, while the other two-thirds provide."

"I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!"
Politics

"Let advertisers spend the same amount of money improving their product that they do on advertising and they wouldn't have to advertise it."

"What the country needs is dirtier fingernails and cleaner minds."

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