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Marriage Quotes

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"Marriage is nature's way of keeping us from fighting with strangers."
Alan King

"You do live longer with bran, but you spend the last fifteen years on the toilet."
Alan King

"Banks have a new image. Now you have 'a friend,' your friendly banker. If the banks are so friendly, how come they chain down the pens?"
Alan King

"Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two."
Ambrose Bierce

"There is so little difference between husbands you might as well keep the first."
Adela Rogers St. Johns

"Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her."
Ambrose Bierce

"If you want to read about love and marriage, you've got to buy two separate books."
Alan King

"The concept of two people living together for 25 years without a serious dispute suggests a lack of spirit only to be admired in sheep."
A. P. Herbert

"Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage."
Ambrose Bierce

"The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less."
Brendan Behan

"It destroys one's nerves to be amiable every day to the same human being."
Benjamin Disraeli

"Marriage - a book of which the first chapter is written in poetry and the remaining chapters in prose."
Beverley Nichols

"Marriage is a wonderful invention: then again, so is a bicycle repair kit."
Billy Connolly

"Why does a woman work ten years to change a man's habits and then complain that he's not the man she married?"
Barbra Streisand

"No man is regular in his attendance at the House of Commons until he is married."
Benjamin Disraeli

"I'd marry again if I found a man who had fifteen million dollars, would sign over half to me, and guarantee that he'd be dead within a year."
Bette Davis

"Love-matches are made by people who are content, for a month of honey, to condemn themselves to a life of vinegar."
Countess of Blessington

"Marriage is a feast where the grace is sometimes better than the dinner."
Charles Caleb Colton

"More marriages might survive if the partners realized that sometimes the better comes after the worse."
Doug Larson

"On rare occasions one does hear of a miraculous case of a married couple falling in love after marriage, but on close examination it will be found that it is a mere adjustment to the inevitable."
Emma Goldman

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